HOME Ramblings about “Children”
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Contemplate, ruminate
Your world
has been remade
A simple act, a natural one
New entrant
does invade
Conceived in love, that you brought forth
A being
wrought unique
Joy makes you delirious
Responsibility
makes you weak
A lifetime of experience
You counted
on before
Fled the very moment that
New life
came in the door
You’re somehow more than were before
But
preparation fails you
No memories now exist to give
Perspective
to your world, new
Everything you understood
Forever
changed today
A warm accomplished feeling you
Can’t
explain away
Suddenly you understand
Of all
things, you are part
Deep inside where life begins
The future
gets its start
Love is tearing me apart
What best
for child or me?
Cleave from me a soul not ready?
Preserve my
sanity
Secure a distance, let me live
Have a life
distinct
Keep her close enough for safety
Keep strong
the bonds that link
I have a duty to protect
My own naïve offspring
I have a duty to retain
My own
desire to sing
Grow I wish, my life renewed
Joy so
newly found
Grapple now with thoughts untold
Resolve
conflicts profound
Look at me, what do you see?
A face that
is quite fair
What you say I surely hear,
But
understanding isn’t there
You speak in terms, for you are clear
I hear them not the same
What is easy in your mind
Always to me is bane
The tools I have, it seems are lacking
To do the
things you do
I must try them, one by one
Slowly
master few
More machine in my attempts
Than you,
to process thought
I take commands quite literally
Between two worlds I’m caught
Computers and my brain do act
Without an
intuition
Value judgments are, it seems
Beyond my
born condition
But I can learn to reason out
Indefinite
and vague
The process will take longer but
New rules
must now be made
Like writing new instructions for
Machines to
make them think
I must be taught the things I lack
Supply the
missing link
The problem is, what isn’t said
Not with
what I hear
I am expected to supply
Some things
that aren’t there
Each process must be built for me
Brick by
brick foundation
If even one is not supplied
Result is
my frustration
I know the things I do not know
My
reasoning is quite fine
I need to have explained to me
Relationships
of mind
Words like now, before, between
Do have
precise set meaning
My frame of reference won’t allow
Me to
conceive their leaning
My strength is not in binding thoughts
But following
directions
My need is for the programming
To make my
own connections
I need to build a knowledge base
I need you
to contribute
Literal though my view will be
I can be
taught to impute
Separately I might remain
From your
world of real
I still may find a way with help
The gap between us heal
In the eyes of the children are the truths of the world
Purest of
dreams, exuberance hurled
Brashness of logic, simple in rule
Pure is
their insight,… honesty their tool
I watched a baby live today
Enjoying
all that’s new
Drinking in the things it sees
Trying to
grasp its view
Eyes so wide, like magnets pulled
The world
inside to hold
One day these treasured images
A
Personality will mold
Sights and sounds not understood
Stored for
future use
Will surely form a basis for
The truth,
in time deduce
A soup primordial, fertile ground
The growth
of intellect
A future generation grows
Its
synapses connect
Its body thrives on food it eats
And alternately
rests
But life itself will feed the mind
Incessant
mettle test
The miracle of life, before
My eyes begins to be
Though closely watched it still remains
Unanswered
mystery
We spoke today, I saw a glimmer
Progress
toward the light
Working hard to stand alone
She’s
learning how to fight
Sorting possibilities
Imagining
results
Trying out all kinds of things
Not any
twist insults
What ever she has need to do
She will
embrace, employ
Focused on the goal she has
She’ll
likely find some joy
Perspective real is coming through
To life she
will adjust
She has the stuff to see it through
If only she
will trust
The brightness and invention in
Her mind
and gritty strength
Once oriented to the truth
She’ll go
to any length
To make it work a family
A husband
and a son
She’ll not rest until she’s proved
She can get it done
Parents stand upon the shore
As time the
river flows its course
Feeds their children life’s discourse
Imbues them
with discovery’s force
In The face of effort spent
Thoughts
rejected freely lent
Offspring rail without consent
Unconcerned
with helps intent
Control they find cannot be
As they
watch helplessly
New visions they unwilling see
Steadfast
support the only key
Parents can’t control the fate
Of
children, many learn too late
That flying is a solo gait
That comes
no warning, is innate
Timing, is the only thing
When will
the children reach their spring?
When life in all its glory sings
And gives
their souls the gift of wings
To each it comes, no parent chooses
When inside
reaches out and uses
All that’s come before, effuses
Takes a
step, return refuses
Passes through the door to know
That some
things come, and never go
Change forever, it is so
Lose their
innocence, wiser grow
Hi dad, How are you? What cha doin?
Child away,
calling home, info spewin
Nothing much, same old stuff, nice to hear you
Father knows, given time, he will get clue
Got a problem? Want to talk? Need some help?
Sometimes, of course, it is just… well
Nothing special, thought I’d call and just chat,
A keep in
touch call, keep the contact
Other times she wants my ear, wants me to hear
As some new
problem she does battle, to see clear
Doesn’t seek my wisdom, counsel or experience
Wants my
presence, loves unconditional continuance
A monologue I listen to as if I’m in her mind
Solutions
many she tries on, soon I come to find
Answer is not mine to give, I am in truth a rock
Foundation
of a life she’s building, she makes from her own stock
I know that I am privileged, as she invites me in
Allowed to
see her working in the depths of her within
She bares her soul in view of me, hides not from my eyes
And give to
me a precious gift, a father’s pride, a prize
How I love thee child of mine
Evolving, changing, fighting time
Your joys are mine, your sorrows too
As life demands the best of you
Your successes warm my heart
Fill me with delight
Pride is swelling in my chest
As you do the things I might
Though long ago I did embark
A way of life to make my mark
My legacy, it seems, will be
The parts of you that came from me
Little spirits, pieces of me
Very
different you can see
Growing straight, sturdy and strong
Miracle of
life, mystery and song
How’d I know did right not wrong
Giving
principles, guide you along
Time will tell if I did right
Should have
I, the reins kept tight?
Wonderful people, each of you
Unmatched
by others, in my view
Loving, caring, bright, astute
Comeuppance
needed, you’re not mute
I have learned from each of you
To share my
life, the details too
To watch you grow, gives me pleasure
One two
three, all are treasure
Two of you now have your own
You must
harvest what you’ve sown
Every day a new dilemma
Describe
for a child burnt sienna
Joy and woe all mixed together
Grapple
with life, unclothed unfettered
Give your love until your empty
Discover
then, you still have plenty
Let me make my point quite clearly
I love you
all so very dearly
In the end, as you’ve taught me
Your
children will, teach you to see
I heard my daughter say she’d been
Raised by
loving hands
In the merest of an instant she
Made my
heart expand
She validated all those years
I worried
day and night
That problems of her parents making
Would
distort for her loves light
But she has made me see it clear
From my
shoulders taken weight
The love of both her parents kept
Her
balanced for her mate
And now she is the mother of
A loving
family
It makes me proud to know she has
Some traits
that came from me
Out of the Blue
A card from you
No reason at all
In my hand it does fall
To tell of your love
Like a gentle dove
Whisper respect
And awe I detect
I’m not all that great
Just love and relate
Treated you well
Always did tell
Truth even though
It might hurt and so
You trusted in me
To help you to see
But wisdom was yours
I just focused the course
As develop your mind
You always did find
The answers you sought
When relating me thought
I love you so much
My heart you did touch
Your pride in my being
Just mirrored my feeling
Of my dad’s effect
On me, I elect
To remember I felt
He a goal to me dealt
A standard to measure
My worth, and ensure
Principles to carry
On life’s itinerary
But never to feel
A contest real
To be the same
As he, in my zeal
To absorb from him
A passion, not whim
To be responsive
To souls and give
What caring is needed
Like grass being seeded
So souls will ensure
That love will endure
And you have confirmed
That the love you returned
To me, is the same
From my father that came
And passed on to you
As love born brand new
Helped you to be
My dreams true to see
Which completes for me
Loves circle but not
For you who’ve now got
A gift to pass on
A loving carillon
Played in the thoughts and beautiful feelings
We’ve come to expect when between us we’re dealing
If person to person you pass on your essence
If you to the next one your love you dispense
Forever this love will keep its momentum
My cup overflows, yours too, my dreamed outcome
Listen children, the day is coming
Hopefully
far off
When this earthly form I’m wearing
Surly I
must doff
As I have done, so must you
As
generation passes
Each in turn assumes their place
Parents, lads
and lasses
But far from gone, will I be
If life
I’ve lived correct
I’ll be with you each new born day
Until we
next connect
If I have given part of me
To each of
you in life
My leaving will not change a thing
Nor cleave
our bond, a knife
I’ll live in you beyond my years
Eternal
young and strong
The past will serve as quiet room
For
meetings short or long
Whenever you decide you need
A private
talk with me
I’m always there for you to call
Just look
inside to see
An endless store of memories with
Sights and
sounds complete
You can make them live anew
Or as they
were, repeat
What was before is yours to keep
Forever in
your heart
My job, is now to fill that store
Before it’s
time to part
With time together, conversations
Exchange of
essence deep
Little things we daily do
From dawn
until we sleep
Words of wisdom, friendly ear
Laughter or
a tear
Little things that make the bonds
That hold
us year to year
Be a father and a friend
Confidant
or foil
Argue disagree relent
But always
we are loyal
Be a part each others life
In all the
ways we can
So linked we are in memory
No strain,
recall the man
Who ever present made his mark
On each of
you in turn
Became a part inseparable
So none
will need to learn
Too late the things important that
Our lives
must contain
The words and deeds of everyday
The fancy
and the plain
The silly or profound things
The nature
matters not
It’s that we care and show it well
Express it
quite a lot
It’s not the what or how or when
That I have
need to see
It’s that I must be part of you
For you I
must be me
If we together are to be
In life and
memory
We simply must together see
We must
simply… be.
The phone it rings insistently
From ether,
message clear
A miracle from my pocket comes
Connects to
children dear
The voice I hear familiar is
Always the
words the same
“Where are you?” the voice inquires
It knows,
no roots I claim
Affection understood of course
It’s curiosity
Where has this modern miracle
Found
father hastily
We’re bound electronically
No distance
is too far
For us to chat or help somehow
With words
bounced off a star
It is as if I keep them close
Within that
little case
Push a button hear their voice
No matter what
the pace
It’s not the same as being there
But serve
it does quite well
To keep me close all day and night
If me they
need to tell
Some anecdote or growing pain
A crisis or
new date
A grandchild’s pride, tuition due
All joy to
hear, relate
The simple act of calling me
To make me
live a part
Of life as they are living it
Completely
warms my heart
So serve it does to make them feel
I’m only
out of sight
Just around the corner if
Reach out
to me they might
And thus the answer I must give
To “Where
are you?” No fear
No matter what the distance is
Must always
be, “I’m here”.
I look in vain into her face
For the
person I have known
But try I might she is not there
Result of
seeds she’s sown
No light resides within her eyes
No smile
does grace her lips
No humor bubbles from her mouth
Just smoke
twixt coffee sips
She is so gray and lifeless now
No fighting
spirit lives
I fear to look into her eyes
Of what I
see to give
I want to scream and shake her hard
Restore her
spirit strong
I want to hold her in my arms
Heal life’s
wounds and wrongs
Yet neither, can I do today
As from
herself she hides
Just grieve for help I cannot give
And watch
her as she slides
Farther from the bright young thing
That graced
us one and all
And search for ways to bring her back
Stop her
from the fall
But help must come from inside first
To know the
path desired
To shed the false destructive things
Through
life she has acquired
I would give my life itself
To give her
happiness
But I can’t live her life for her
To herself
she must confess
In honesty and confidence
She needs
to see her life
And share the truth with family
Help her
end the strife
Painful it is bound to be
Before it
better is
Painful better for a time
Then future
lost, my wish
I cannot stand to watch my child
Disappear
from view
Destroyed while I stand helpless by
Not knowing
what to do
I must do something, anything
And pray
for guidance right
I must do something if I’m ever
To sleep
again at night
It is as much my own salvation
As hers
that is at stake
No parent can a child abandon
Help again,
the choice I make
Tears of joy my face adorn
As this day
a doctor’s born
Daughter center stage and proud
Receives
her honors magna loud
Every day the faxes come
Under
Maria’s eye
Faithfully she passes them
To mother
on the fly
Perhaps the next one will be mine
She muses
usually
But alas the next is not
As she can
plainly see
Patiently she waits for one
That has
her name on top
Look at that one coming out
She’s so
happy she could hop
Never saw a thing so pretty
Her name
upon a fax
She looking for another now
She
certainly can’t relax
She’ll have to look at every one
None escape
her view
Perhaps another one for her
Will soon
be coming through
Alley oop, flippity flop
Wash the
ceiling with a mop
Paint the house green and blue
Wait till
father catches you
Walk in mothers great big shoes
So many
pairs from which to choose
Drop the soda on the floor
You’re in
trouble, that’s for sure
Little children playing hard
For their
mothers stay on guard
Trouble seems to follow them
A silken
flower lost its stem
Running jumping flying… crash
Didn’t
mean, that thing to smash
Quick, clean up the little pieces
Or no
candy, cups of Reeses
Children trying to have fun
Get in
trouble for what they’ve done
Didn’t mean to end this way
Born to
jump and run and play
In a world where grownups stay
Making
rules that they do say
How can little ones learn, explore
With rules
designed to children bore
Vacuum out the toilet bowl
Kick the
football to the goal
Never mind the field’s inside
Across the
living room they slide
Why do parents make a fuss
Because you
rode a different bus
Sold your lunch for a brand new pair
Of golden
hamsters soft and fair
How’d they expect you to get knowledge
You’re too
young to go to college
You must try to find things out
Test your
lungs, yell and shout
New things get your full attention
Take it
apart is your intention
If you cannot make it whole
Bury it
outside in a hole
Not to worry, isn’t time
Too many
things left to climb
As soon as one thing gets too boring
Off you go
with friends exploring
Most of all remember you
Must make your face angelic to
Escape the wrath of mom and dad
Help them
know you’re good… not bad
There is a young lady that lives in a house
Madison
Connecticut is where she does grouse
Tall and slender of build is she
Feeding the
birds gives her lots of glee
She can cook and bake and eat
With her
new teeth she is complete
With our Maria we can have a ball
We love her truly one and all
Lightly sits the crown
The candles
lit, are waiting
The birthday boy is smiling
His joy
anticipating
Lights are dimmed, the song is sung
A breath
expelled for wishes
Applause and cheers expand his smile
The result
for him, delicious
Another child, his cake adorned
Prepares to
take his turn
Receives from first, his crown to wear
Unselfish
kindness learns
The future of tomorrow is
Foretold in
that exchange
A child of love secure within
Another’s
thoughts arrange
And all the world is thus effected
By the
growing of a child
Who passes on his nature through
His
giving,… God has smiled
A child is sad, with life she struggles
Romance
brings pain and tears
The parent watches torn apart
His advice
falls on deaf ears
How to tell one so young
Life and
death it’s not
Loving isn’t easy or
Responsive
to her plot
The world is what it wants to be
Not what
she’d rather have
She sees just what she wants to see
Which
brings not any salve
She surely knows the answers to
The
questions in her mind
But wont accept reality
Desire does
keep her blind
She loves him more than he loves her
Refers to
him as friend
Wants and needs more than he
Will give
or even lend
She’s formed a strong connection, lives
According
to his rule
Her heart does suffer greatly as
She counts
herself a fool
Trouble is she lives a lie
Made a
bargain she can’t keep
Be a friend without commitment
Tears her
heart, destroys her sleep
The answer should be obvious
Resolve or
move away
Tell him what she wants and needs
No more
games attempt to play
Don’t fool herself or mislead him
No good
will come of either
Friendship works for two not one
Any less is
just deceiver
Saint Patty’s day comes once a year
All the
Irish celebrate with cheer
Leprechauns and pots of gold
Adorn the
cards that have been sold
But I have got a special gift
Maria’s
card gave me a lift
Made by hand with love and care
She gave to
me a smile to wear
They walk along the gravel path
Talk
incessantly of life
The myriad of little things
Give joy or
cause them strife
The air is cool the sun is warm
The river
flow is swift
A daughter and her father share
Their
lives… and that is gift
I see it in their eyes and hear it
In their joyful voices
My children and their children as
They make
life’s daily choices
Love abounds in all they do
Its
security does bind them
Teaching them respect for self
And each other, like a rare gem
They’re all learning as they go
Even
parents from their offspring
The song of life is there for all
As in
chorus they do all sing
In a partnership of love I have
Watched
them all to grow
Children I am proud of
Reaping
what they sow
Raising their own children
Meeting
challenges of living
Oft times will bring a tear as
I’m warmed
by all their giving
There’s beauty in the world
Of many
sorts and kinds
But a parents joy from children
Is the
greatest that one finds
Enough, enough, I want to rest
Had my fill
of life’s tough tests
Children growing, never grown
Reap the
seeds in past we’ve sown
Peace once mine is driven out
By past
returned, its legacy shout
Parent then and parent now
I’ll muddle
through this latest bout
Sunny days do amaze me
And all
within my view
All I need to me decreed
From earth
to sky of blue
Warm and fed my mind is led
To things
to me unknown
I am to be, to think and see
A future to
be sown
All is new, eat and chew
A world I
must devour
But my cocoon will end too soon
Ahead my
finest hour
Ghosts of the future haunting me
Eyes of a
child that will not see
Grandchild
raised in tyranny
Prisoners
of each other be
Grandmother molds a daughters mind
Appears
again in grandson, blind
Child
in elders cannot find
Support
or love or manner kind
Husband missing, used to beat
Mother
hard, love defeat
Future
planned by past quite neat
Victim pie they all must eat
I gave to keep them warm and safe
Spare them
lives of pain and chafe
Helped and healed, applied my balm
Deflected
fear and kept them calm
Watched them try to learn to live
Never
failed the call to give
Learned too late the seeds I’ve sown
Now they
can’t stand on their own
With my strength I made them weak
Took from
them the need to seek
Those things that in us all must be
If we are
ever to be free
Now they struggle, ill prepared
To
understand why they have fared
So poorly in the life they sought
‘Cause hard
enough they have not fought
Never tested ‘till this day
They now
must make, each one, their way
Learn the lessons life must teach
If they,
their goals, expect to reach
Feel the pain and know the doubt
Pushed by
hunger, challenge rout
Sink or swim by self, alone
As for my
sins they now atone
And I in sorrow must admit
My love did
harm, misguided, it
Watch their dramas now unfold
And stay
within the shadows, cold
‘Twas not their pain I took away
But mine, I
see, theirs just delay
I pray within themselves they find
Strength
and wisdom, think of me, kind